Cars and the Man
Cathy Petkoff---his wife
Sergio----law intern/ Snowa’s fiance
Ward Cleaver---neighborhood watch guy
Act 1 Snowa’s bedroom. Scene begins in darkness.
Snowa-- Wh-What! Who’s there? [turns on light]
Bluntly-- Oh! Excuse me. I seem to have fallen in through your window. Shh! They’re looking for me.
Sn-- Don’t “Shh” me! You must be some sorta pervert, but I can protect myself. [She pulls out a huge black dildo from her bedstand.]
Bl-- My God, what’s that?
Sn-- It’s my night-stick.
Bl-- But that’s a... Um, you don’t know what it is?
Sn-- Of course, it’s a night-stick, and it beats men who come in my room!
Bl-- What my father wouldn’t give for a salesman like you!
Sn-- But I’m a girl. [She pulls her covers away, revealing large breasts.
Bl-- [blown away] I’m pleased to make your acquaintits, I mean tance, acquaintance.
Sn-- Who’s looking?
Bl-- [pulling his eyes up from her breasts] Not me!
Sn-- Who’s looking for you?
Bl-- Well, I see for myself, but I swear I wasn’t looking. [he looks]
Sn-- Something got you up here.
Bl-- [hands in front of pants] How embarrassing!
Sn-- [noticing a cut on his hand] Did you hurt yourself? Let me see it.
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